You should all thank the TLC show 'Wild Weddings' for getting my creative juices flowing for this new post. All of a sudden while I was sulking in my bedroom because I couldn't think of anything to write, I glanced at the TV screen to see a newlywed eat it on the dance floor. Then I looked at her light pink colored heels and laughed because what real woman, unless you're really wasted, falls flat on her face because of her lack of maneuvering skills in pumps? And believe me, these were no 6" stilettos.
That's about the point when my brain went 'EUREKA'!
No, this post is not about making fun of brides, this post is about the lack of high heels in school! Yes, I'm actually serious.
Everyone knows the start of school is just around the corner for most of us, although I know there are cruel and unjust school systems that already forced some of you all to start. There are many, many things I dislike about school; mainly that it actually exists. But one of the worst things to deal with style wise, is that you can't wear high heels! Either because of a strict dress code, or because your classes are always 1423 miles apart-heels simply have no place in a student's life! So I decided to make a list-a list of all the shoes that I wish I could wear to school, but if I ended up wearing them I would most likely just faceplant like the unfortunate bride from Wild Weddings.
It's no secret that I adore Marc Jacobs shoes, even though his new Ready To Wear collection is 90's grunge in not such a good way. But these are actually really great, they have so much going for them. These fall into the military look, without being too literal. And they're black meaning you could wear them with anything at all. Too bad they cost $368 which I don't think many people reading this can afford. But hey, I never said that my dream list was cheap
You know what I see a lot of lately? Girls confusing 'shiny' with 'sparkly'. Shiny is like satin, or kind of like a can of soda. Sparkly is like sequins, and glitter. Of course you could always follow the example Tyra Banks and a pre-trashy LaLo set in Life Size. Sparkle and Shine. Eve would certainly find these Sunnyvale approved! Though, Tyra is a millionaire and she could probably afford the $385 price tag. If only we could get her to spread the wealth a little (not that she would, she's probably rip out her own weave before letting any of us hone in on her money). Christian Louboutin shoes, what girl doesn't dream of these holy creations? I know it's probably kind of sacrilegious to say that they're holy-but dammit these are incredible! When I went to DSW once, there were some super high lacy pumps that sort of looked like these, and I wanted them so badly[I say that about a lot of stuff, don't I?]. Unfortunately, my mom decided to snap me back into reality and ask me 'What would you really wear these to?' and I promptly put them back. Because face it-I would look like a joke to most people. Older people don't seem to receive teenagers in "real peoples" footwear that well. Maybe it's because they're jealous that we can take the pain, and they're forced into orthopedic sneakers.
These weigh in at most expensive on my list at $720. Ouch. That's not what I wanted to hear
My favorite shoes for fall would have to be the ankle boot, a trend that everyone is picking up on lately. Sure, there are flat versions of this style-but the platform is just so much cooler. Personally, I think mostly everything looks better with a heel. Flats are my favorite for comfort, but I'd be in platforms/wedges/heels 24/7 if dumb schools weren't spread out so far.
These are $515, and I don't even know why I'm bothering to type up the prices. You're all probably cursing me and my need to foist attractive and ungodly expensive footwear in your faces.
The brand that makes these shoes is called 'Pleaser USA' and they actually make really high stripper shoes, so I was extremely surprised to find these adorable shoes that mimic a spectator look. And these are much more consumer friendly at $40 on Zappos. I figured that if I didn't put anything affordable on the list, and angry e-mob would form. Or maybe I just really loved these shoes.This entry post proves that inspiration can come from the weirdest places.
So I'd like to thank the lady that fell on national television for inspiring me! Have a very happy marriage! Maybe when I'm working and disgustingly rich, I'll mail you a pair of shoes on this list, okay?
Labels: shoes, wild weddings